I'm 5 and a half weeks pregnant today (38 days) which is just past where I was in my last pregnancy when we found out the pregnancy wasn't viable. I have yet to really experience any early pregnancy symptoms. The absence of symptoms worries me at times.. I keep thinking that no symptoms must mean the baby isn't growing. I know that not all women experience symptoms and that it doesn't mean anything is wrong but it's hard.
My first "quick check" appointment is scheduled for Monday afternoon. I can't wait for them to tell me what I already know. Honestly, until I have an ultrasound and see that everything is progressing normally I am going to continue to worry about losing this child. Even after the ultrasound I'm going to continue to worry. I have been trying to keep positive and not think about everything but it's challenging. I'm hoping that after the doctors appointment on Monday my mind can be put at ease a little and I can start enjoying the fact that I am actually pregnant and that Jon and I will be bringing a tiny life into this world at the end of the summer.
I'm totally excited, don't get me wrong. I've come to accept the fact that I will not be playing softball this summer.. There's always fall ball, right? :) Jon plans to drink enough for the both of us on our honeymoon in April, so we have that covered. I am excited for maternity clothes and an adorable baby bump. Hoping I won't blow up like a balloon with a ton of extra weight! I can't wait to pick out stuff for the nursery and register.
Two of my close friends are pregnant and are expecting in July - so I'm happy that our baby will hopefully have some playmates around the same age :) There are so many things to look forward to. So many people have lost a child and have gone on to have a completely healthy baby and normal pregnancy. I know that I can too. My goal is just to remain positive and to try not to worry about things that I have no control over. This is easier said then done of course.
No comments:
Post a Comment